Procrastination

It's not like I ordinarily know it. I'm not running around dialing the operator in a desperate attempt to reach destination fun. Nor am I running around trying to avoid work. When I'm at work I tend to just stare blandly at the screen - and you know how creepy people staring at the movie theatre are. Lethargy. Where would we be without it? Depends on what you believe. If you believe in creationism then we'd still be in Eden because we wouldn't have been asked tasting the forbidden fruit (please note, people, the forbidden fruit is the apple and not the woman). In this case lethargy is a decidedly good thing. If you believe in evolution, things get more complex. Take the conversation between several ancient (but strangely familiar) monkeys.

Ape Tim: Ben, hurry up. Time to evolve.
Ape Ben: Yeah, I'll get around to it once I finish reading this scrap of bark. whoa, no. Damn. It was another lizard.
Ape Nic: What? You guys are useless. You always say your going to evolve but never organise your molecular structure.
Ape Tim: Yeah, and do I see you evolving, Ape-boy?
Ape Nic: But it's late and I want to go home.
Ape Ben: I have a strange desire to add sugar to acid, dilute slightly and pour it down my throat.
Ape Dave: Ohh, look, a girl ape.
Ape Ben: That's not a girl, Dave. That's my younger bro-ape.
Ape Dave: Damnit. All us apes look exactly the same. Isn't that James?
Ape Tim: Yeah. He's an orangutan now. Part of his long term positioning strategy. And he's not a girl either. So suck it.
Ape Ben: Argh! My book-lizard is trying to eat my foot.
Ape Dave: Then ... if only we had a conception of violence.
Ape Ben: muh. ow. muh.
Ape Tim: So, what can we do now, before and without computers, mobile phones or Buffy?
Ape Nic: Let's go dance around that big shiny black thing and get the inspiration to hit people with sticks and stones - providing monkeydom with the ability use violence for progress therefore become more advanced.
Ape Tim: pfft. fag.
Ape Dave: Where's that creepy music coming from?

In this scenario lethargy would not have enabled us to evolve to the stage where we can use violence to express our feelings for each other. Futhermore, we'd be stuck in a weird and creepy environment where it was difficult to tell the difference who was a man and who was a woman. This is decidedly bad.

Also, if you believe in Star Wars *Spoiler* It didn't really happen. They never really existed. Not even the wookie.*ENDS* - imagine if Luke was some sort of lethargic whinger who didn't really want to do anything. Ok. Then imagine that Jar-Jar-Binks was some sort of lethargic whinger who didn't really want to do anything. Episode 1 would have been a MUCH better movie.

To conclude: lethargy is bad, not being an ape is good, and Episode 1 does not deserve to be rated in the same 4 star category as Donnie Darko.

I have got to get out more. And indulge in less torpidity. Damn you, torpidity, damn you to muh.

Pie still good.